One day while exceptionally bored, I thought of the brilliant idea: why not match Kelly Clarkson songs to NHL teams! Because songs about relationships match up so well with hockey teams, obviously. So, after listening to every Kelly Clarkson song at least three times, I think I’ve got it.

There are sure to be some song and team pairs that are a stretch, but that’s what happens when you compare a multi-platinum female pop artist’s discography with hockey teams.

ANAHEIM DUCKS – Irvine

This is about the lowest point of Kelly’s life, written in a bathroom of an Orange County arena. The Ducks absolutely suck and play in an Orange County arena.

BOSTON BRUINS – Since U Been Gone

Since Phil Kessel/Joe Thornton been gone, the Bruins have won the Cup for the first time (in a long time). They’re so moving on, yeah yeah.

BUFFALO SABRES – Hole

The hole referenced in the song is where owner Terry Pegula is throwing all of his money.

CALGARY FLAMES – Low

Low is all about a low point in life, when everyone is talking about how much you suck and look at you all sympathetically. The Calgary Flames are going through said low point.

CAROLINA HURRICANES – Hello

This is about how nobody is paying attention to the subject of the song. Likewise, I don’t really pay any attention to the Hurricanes.

CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS – Before Your Love

“I never lived before you love” is kind of like how the Blackhawks didn’t really exist before they got Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane.

COLORADO AVALANCHE – The War is Over

Because the great 90s rivalry between the Avalanche and the Red Wings is all but over.

COLUMBUS BLUE JACKETS – Behind These Hazel Eyes

Just as Kelly Clarkson is once again disappointed by the guy in the song, Blue Jackets fans are once again disappointed that Jeff Carter and James Wisneiwski are not the answers to their being good woes.

DALLAS STARS – Breakaway

As the Stars are breaking away from Marc Crawford, Tom Hicks, and Brad Richards, they are emerging as better than before. And I’m sure its foot was in the crease at some point.

DETROIT RED WINGS – My Life Would Suck Without You

The fans live in Detroit, and the other local teams are either the Tigers, Bears, or Pistons. Their lives would suck without the Red Wings.

EDMONTON OILERS – One Minute

One minute, the Oilers look amazing and skilled. The next, they remind you why they’re not going to make the playoffs again.

FLORIDA PANTHERS – Long Shot

It’s a long shot that the Panthers will be super successful long-term, because let’s be real, the Miami sports market sucks.

LOS ANGELES KINGS – Beautiful Disaster

The Kings are supposed to be such a great team, the best in the West; they certainly have the roster for it. Yet, their season has been a bit of a disaster.

MINNESOTA WILD – Mr. Know-It-All

Everybody thinks the Wild are a trap first, ask questions later type of team, one that isn’t all that good. Yet, they’ve been a surprisingly good team thus far this season, showing the other teams that “you don’t know a thing about me.”

MONTREAL CANADIENS – Haunted

The Habs are haunted by the teams of the past, and the fact that they will never live up to the lofty standards that Habs fans now have, which includes possibly the hardest feat known to man: speaking Quebecois French.

NASHVILLE PREDATORS – All I Ever Wanted

All the Predators ever wanted was to make it to the second round of the playoffs, but then they realized it was kind of overrated.

NEW JERSRY DEVILS – Because Of You

Playing on the safe side and not letting anyone else in? It’s like the trap in a song.

NEW YORK ISLANDERS – The Sun Will Rise

The only other option I could think of for the Islanders was Heart of Glass, until I realized that’s a Skye Sweetnam song and what the hell why I am thinking of Skye Sweetnam songs? Basically, the song is about how things suck right now, but eventually they’ll be okay. I’d imagine that’s the only way an Islanders fan can stand being an Islanders fan right now.

NEW YORK RANGERS – Let Me Down

Just as the guy in the song is “only gonna let me down when it counts,” the Rangers and their free agent signings seem to always be disappointing to their fans.

OTTAWA SENATORS – You Thought Wrong

Remember Tamyra Gray? Chances are, you don’t – she placed third in the original American Idol, but arguably had a better voice than Kelly. The Senators, similarly, are the third most popular Eastern Canadian team, and everyone kind of forgets about them, despite arguably being the best of the three since the lockout. The lyrics are also pretty aplicable to the Heatley situation.

PHILADELPHIA FLYERS – Honestly

Kelly’s plea for honesty from her man is like everyone’s plea for honesty from the Flyers’ medical staff.

PHOENIX COYOTES – Don’t You Wanna Stay

Well, don’t they?

PITTSBURGH PENGUINS – Stronger

“Think you left me broken down.” Oh no, Sidney Crosby has a concussion! “What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” BOOM! Just as good as before!

SAN JOSE SHARKS – You Can’t Win

Besides the requisite joke about how the Sharks can’t win in the playoffs, this song’s lyrics are about how no matter what a person does, they can’t satisfy everyone. Sort of like how the Sharks keep trying to retool their lineup, only to be met with a bunch of people who think they did it wrong. But mostly this is a joke about how they can’t win in the playoffs.

ST LOUIS BLUES – Some Kind of Miracle

This slower, R&B influenced song is all about how Kelly thought there was no way for her to be happy, when all of a sudden there is this guy who comes into her life and miraculously is exactly what she wants. Basically, this song is about Ken Hitchcock.

TAMPA BAY LIGHTNING – I Forgive You

Fans are forgiving the Lightning for being foolish during their Koules-Barrie term and trading away everyone and signing no defensemen.

TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS – The Trouble With Love Is

This song is all about how love can “make you blind” and “believe a lie.” The belief that the Leafs will sign every good free agent ever by the Leafs fans and media shows how they are affected by love’s troubles.

VANCOUVER CANUCKS – Don’t Be A Girl About It

First of all, there’s the obvious Sedin sisters joke that I have to get out of the way. But seriously, just try to read the chorus and tell me that the Canucks’ organization/fan predilection for complaining about refs doesn’t immediately spring to mind:

Don’t be a girl about it / Cause I didn’t say yes / Don’t be a girl about / Cause I wouldn’t pretend / Don’t be a girl about it / And now you’re whining again

WASHINGTON CAPITALS – Where Is Your Heart

The Washington Capitals have no heart and suck in the playoffs (says the Sharks fan).

WINNIPEG JETS – A Moment Like This

Winnipeg got it’s Jets back, and so possibly feel like Kelly Clarkson did once she won American Idol. That they got the Thrashers is sort of like how Kelly had to do the From Justin to Kelly movie.

BONUS! ATLANTA THRASHERS – Gone

Fight On, for ol’ SC

Our men Fight On to victory

Our alma mater dear

Looks up to you

Fight On and win

For ol’ SC

Fight On to victory

Fight On

And then it gets even more absurd with this comment as they switched back to the studio:

“I hope everyone is safe.”

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? NOTHING HAPPENED! Oh no, the power went out! Everyone is instantly in danger! Never mind that San Franciscans and other Bay Area residents have lives through actual disasters, like that same Loma Prieta quake you were prattering about earlier. That comment is reserved for actual disasters and dangerous situations, not for power outages that were fixed within the hour.

I understand that San Francisco and the entire Bay Area is known for their earthquakes. And we recognize that – our taller buildings are often described by how high of a magnitude they can withstand, and we have more earthquake drills than fire drills. But that also means that if there’s an earthquake, we know how to deal with it. Our incompetence in driving while it’s raining is made up for by our nonchalance for quakes smaller than 6.0 on the Richter scale.

But that’s besides the point, because there wasn’t even an earthquake. A transformer blew, and the power went out for so brief of a time the beer didn’t even get warm. Yet it was treated as the next World Series quake, because MNF is stupid.

I love the shirt ends tied at the waist. And the pigtail braids. It's just so 90s.

I love bubblegum pop, especially late 90s/early 2000s bubblegum pop. I love how happy it is, how despite the songs may be about being lonely or cheating or being dumped, they always sound so peppy. And there’s always a music video that includes a large, choreographed dance sequence with the girls in midriff-baring baby tees. And you can’t forget the whispered/moaned “baby” by one of the singers.

That brings me to the purpose of this post on the long-neglected blog: I want to create the ultimate bubblegum pop playlist. One that will automatically plunge you into sugary-sweet nostalgia every time you put it on. One that not only has the bubblegum heavyweights of Britney Spears, Nsync, and the Backstreet Boys, but also the Aaron Carters and 98 Degrees of the pop world. And while I do love me some pop music, I am far from an expert. So this post’s purpose is to create a hive mind of sorts to have all the great pop music in one place. None of the current hip-hop-influenced stuff, just the pure pop.

To start everything off, here are some of the tracks that I put on a playlist that influenced this post:

Give Me Just One Night (Una Noche) –   98 Degrees
Bouncing Off the Ceiling (Upside Down) –   A*Teens
Aaron’s Party – Aaron Carter
Complicated –   Avril Lavigne
Sk8er Boi –   Avril Lavigne
Everybody (Backstreet’s Back) –   Backstreet Boys
Larger Than Life – Backstreet Boys
The Call – Backstreet Boys
I Want It That Way – Backstreet Boys
Baby One More Time – Britney Spears
Stronger –   Britney Spears
Lucky – Britney Spears
Oops!…I Did It Again – Britney Spears
Genie In A Bottle – Christina Aguilera
Survivor – Destiny’s Child
Blue – Eiffel 65
Boys and Girls – Good Charlotte
So Yesterday – Hillary Duff
Perfect Day – Hoku
I Think I’m In Love With You – Jessica Simpson
Crush – Mandy Moore
Bye Bye Bye –   ‘N Sync
Pop –   ‘N Sync
It’s Gonna Be Me  -  ’N Sync
I Believe I Can Fly –   R Kelly
All Star –   Smash Mouth
Wannabe – Spice Girls

Feel free to add more in the comments. I know I forgot more than a few.

Made specifically for the playoff run as an updated version of my previous Zoolander gif.

Suck It Russell Martin. Also, first time experimenting with animating.

Initially only had Timmy, I added Zito and Cain in.

Matt Cain as Citizen Kane.

First major gif undertaking, inspired the earlier playoff gif.

Velez ran into Russell Martin at the plate. Therefore, Suck It Russell Martin.

Bochy and Uribe do a handshake before a game.

Uribe decides to dance before a game.

Freddy Sanchez reacts to Denny Bautista getting a hit.

Lincecum amuses himself on an off-day by trying to stuff as much gum in his mouth as he can. Cain helps.

Sandoval makes a horrible baserunning error. Man, I’m glad I can look back on this and laugh.

Huff hits a homer to all but destroy the Rockies’ hopes of coming back, and reacts to the sudden silencing of the Rockies fans.

Molina’s dream becomes his worst nightmare.

Affeldt laughs at an ugly finder that goes into the Rockies’ dugout.

He ain’t havin’ it.

First time making a gif without gifsoup; Bumgarner is mad.

Sergio Romo and Amy G. Enough said.

Amy G’s disapproving finger shake to Romo.

Kovalchuk signed a 17 year, $100M contract with the Devils that has been since rejected by the NHL.

Blackhawks continue to blow up their team.

Sharks have re-signed RFA Steve Zalewski to a league minimum, two-way contract.

…And that’s pretty much it for big/Sharks-related news in the NHL. Now excuse me, I’m going to go tan on the beach. If the sun ever comes out, that is.

For those of you completely confused by that first paragraph (how can she get even more beautiful?), here’s a bit of an explanation about the rules concerning free agency. There are two basic types of free agents: unrestricted (UFAs) and restricted (RFAs). UFAs are, with some exceptions, players older than 27. As soon as noon eastern on July 1 hits, a UFA can sign with any team they want, with their former team not getting any compensation. RFAs are players under 27 whose contracts are up but have been qualified by their team. Qualifying offers is basically where a team offers the minimum contract allowed in order to retain that player’s rights. Once they have his rights, if another team signs that player to the offer sheet (giving them a contract that they accept), the team that holds the rights has a chance to either match the offer and retain the player to the exact contract the other team gave the RFA, or let the player go and receive compensation in the form of draft picks based on the cap hit.

Here’s the situation: Chicago can either match the Sharks’ offer and retain Hjalmarsson for a $3.5M cap hit, or they can give him up and receive the Sharks’ 1st and 3rd round picks in the 2011 draft. The Blackhawks currently have $3.6M in cap space after their bonus penalties, and need to add at least 6 players to the roster. If they chose to match the Sharks’ offer, they will have to waive Cristobal Huet, and fill the roster out with near-league minimum players. They will likely lose Niemi as well, as he chose to go to arbitration and will likely be awarded more than they can give him. The Sharks, on the other other hand, already have seven defensemen signed, and will likely have to trade one if Chicago does not match.

GMs don’t offer sheet RFAs. It’s like an unspoken agreement around the league that teams leave RFAs alone, save for trying to trade for their rights and negotiate on their own. Brian Burke is possibly the most outspoken about it, stemming from when Kevin Lowe signed away Dustin Penner from his team at the time, the Anaheim Ducks. Since the inception of the offer sheet, it has only been used a few times, the last time being the aforementioned Penner signing. It has become status quo that RFAs are as good as re-signed, provided they are qualified.

Doug Wilson changed that. For a guy that is such a stickler about decorum and league rules (he refuses to discuss his thoughts about any player not on his team, save for comparisons of Kent Huskins to Rob Scuderi), he was the one that broke the status quo and signed an RFA to an offer sheet.

This was a ballsy move that took advantage of a cap-strapped team. I love it. If Chicago matches, they’re hurt even more cap-wise. If they don’t, Sharks shore up their defense with a young shut-down defenseman. It’s win-win for the Sharks, and lose-lose for the Blackhawks. This is what offer sheeting was supposed to do – make teams mind their cap space more, and allow teams to take advantage of teams who don’t.

Doug Wilson has made this the summer of revenge towards the team that swept the Sharks this playoffs. He first helped facilitate the trade of Byfuglien, Sopel, and Eager to the Thrashers to help dismantle the Blackhawks’ role players, and now he’s attempting to steal out Hjalmarsson from under the Blackhawks and making them make roster decisions much sooner than they would have otherwise (they probably would have waited until after Niemi’s arbitration hearing on July 29th). This is the ultimate response to a playoff sweep, outside of returning the favor.

But besides the kick-ass revenge factor, a Hjalmarsson signing is great on its own. He’s young – only 23, the same age as Vlasic – and already is experienced and a top 4 defenseman. He will instantly be the Sharks’ third-best defenseman, after Boyle and Vlasic. He’s not in the role of the offensive puck-moving defenseman that Wilson loves, but he’s also not the 5th/6th defenseman that the Sharks have four of already. Yeah, he sucked in Game 4 of the Stanley Cup Finals, but he was a large part of the reason why he was in the Finals and the Sharks weren’t.

There’s at the most a week before we all find out whether or not Niklas Hjalmarsson is a San Jose Shark. While I’m personally hoping that Chicago doesn’t match, making the Sharks’ defense that much better instantly, there really isn’t a bad outcome in this situation.

One of the Sharks' 20th anniversary logos, also revealed this week

I’ll be following the draft both today and tomorrow, but here’s just a quick rundown of what has happened this past week.

Brad Staubitz to the Minnesota Wild for a 5th round pick
I like this move. The Sharks only had four draft picks this year, and managed to get another one by giving up their “most minor penalties taken per 60 minutes in the NHL” enforcer. And not a 7th rounder, which I would have expected for an RFA enforcer – a 5th! And regarding team toughness, which does admittedly go down a bit with Staubitz’s departure, there are two prospects in the AHL who both bring size, fighting ability, and actual hockey skills to the table: Frazer McLaren and Brandon Mashinter. See ya, Staubtiz, and to paraphrase the great Humphrey Bogart: We’ll always have Tootoo.

NHL Schedule was released
If you haven’t seen my giant run-down of the schedule yet, click here.

Evgeni Nabokov will not be re-signed
I promise to have an entire post dedicated to him after the craziness of the draft and everything dies down, but for now, let me just say that while it was probably time for the Sharks to move on from the goalie that has been the stalwart in goal for the past decade, all Sharks fans will miss him. From his quirky sense of humor and die-hard competitiveness to chanting “NABBY! NABBY! NABBY!” most every game, from breaking onto the scene with a Calder Trophy to the save of the decade against Brendan Morrow in 2008, we will always remember the greatest goalie in Sharks history. I, for one, will give Nabby a standing ovation whenever the Sharks may play him. And I also hope that someday in the future, his number 20 will be raised to the rafters of HP Pavilion.

Sharks receive Brett Sterling, Mike Vernace, and a 7th round pick from the Atlanta Thrashers for future considerations
This trade seems weird on the surface, but in the context of that night it makes perfect sense. The Chicago Blackhawks were dumping a bunch of contracts they didn’t want on Atlanta (including Shark killer Dustin Byfuglien), but that would have caused Atlanta to go over the contract limit. So the Sharks swooped in, acquired two expiring contracts that would only be valid for the next week or so, and got a 7th round pick for the troubles. Future considerations is a fancy way of saying nothing. So, basically, the Sharks received a 7th round pick for helping deplete the Chicago Blackhawks’ depth and get Byfuglien into the other conference. There is no downside to this.

Patrick Marleau signs for 4 years, $6.9M per
The first of two contract signings yesterday. I’d been advocating for Marleau to be re-signed ever since it became clear that he wasn’t going to be traded. He was the top center UFA out there, with 44 goals and 84 points the past season. It was expected that he’d probably re-sign with the Sharks, although that didn’t stop armchair GMs from drooling over him. His contract falls in line with other Doug Wilson deals – relatively short and the complete opposite of cap circumvention. It’s a bit more expensive than I would have liked, but he does deserve it over his past two seasons, and would be incredibly hard to replace. Shark for life, please.

Joe Pavelski signs for 4 years, $4M per
This is right around where most people pegged him at, even a little less for some, especially after his “Big Pavelski” playoffs. He was one of the ultimate steals the past two years, signed for only $1.67M, and so he deserves the doubled salary. Especially compared to Ryan Kesler – who is a very similar player in most regards and is signed for $1M more – this is a great contract for the 25 year old player, who is by all accounts still going to get better.

The schedule is as follows:

The games highlighted in yellow denote back-to-backs

As has been much publicized over the past few months, the Sharks will be starting their season in Stockholm, Sweden against the Columbus Blue Jackets in a back-to-back “home and home.” The Sharks will technically start their season at home, but their first game in the Tank is also their first game back on North American soil against the Atlanta Thrashers. Their first short homestand will also include a game against the Carolina Hurricanes, before they go on the road for a Northwest division road trip.

The three Eastern Conference teams the Sharks play twice are the Washington Capitals, Buffalo Sabres, and New Jersey Devils. The Sharks played both the Capitals and Sabres twice last year, and replaced the Flyers with the Devils.

As with last year, the Washington Captials have not beat the Sharks at the Tank in now 14 years. However, Ovechkin did manage to score a goal against the Sharks last year, breaking that streak. It still would be nice to see the long record at the Tank hold up. The games will be on February 8 at Washington, and February 17 at San Jose.

Last year’s away game with the Sabres marked only the second and final time the Sharks were shut out all season, with the first being a 1-0 shootout loss. It was notable because it was right before the Olympics, and helped American Hero Ryan Miller get back on track. The games will be on December 9 at Buffalo, and January 6 at San Jose.

The only game the Sharks played the Devils last year was a 4-3 loss, and the first game after the Olympics. However, it was a notable game because the Sharks had a 3 goal third period, just falling short of a comeback. The next three games the Sharks would set an NHL record with the most consecutive regulation comebacks after being down entering the third period. The games will be on October 27 at San Jose, and February 11 at New Jersey.

National Television Targets

Last season, the Sharks were on Versus four times, and NBC none (as has been par for the course since they switched away from regional broadcasts). Unlike the season before last, the Sharks didn’t even have an option of being picked up on NBC last season. However, due to their strong postseason and high ratings garnered in their series against Detroit (set record for highest semifinal ratings on Versus) and Chicago (Game 4 set a record on NBC), there would probably be more of an incentive for the national broadcasts to pick up a Sharks game or five.

Versus only broadcasts on Mondays and Tuesdays (barring any special circumstances) and NBC only broadcasts on Sundays and after the new year (except for the Winter Classic). So, with that in mind, here are some candidates for possible national broadcasts:

Versus:

October 8/9 vs/at Columbus Blue Jackets – These two games will be on Versus, I guarantee it. I mean, they’re in Stockholm and part of the Europe season opener. If they don’t broadcast these two games on Versus, something went wrong with Versus or something.
November 2, at Minnesota – Versus likes Minnesota for some reason. And they had a Sharks-Wild game last season. Plus, it’s the highly anticipated game where Brad Staubitz plays the Sharks for the first time since the trade!
November 15, vs Los Angeles Kings – There’s the whole Northern California/Southern California rivalry, and the Kings are actually good now. Then again, they are both Californian teams, and it’s at the Tank, which Versus hates. Maybe not.
November 30/December 6/February 22, vs/at Detroit Red Wings – Already a great match-up before last season’s playoffs, but last season’s semifinals series just makes these three games even more attractive to Versus. The two in Detroit are more likely of the three to happen, because of the aforementioned aversion to San Jose.
February 8, at Washington Capitals – The Capitals are one of Versus’s favorite teams, and a matchup against the Sharks would pit two of the most dynamic teams in the league against each other.
March 1, versus Colorado Avalance – A rematch of the first round series from last season, Versus also showed a Sharks-Avs game last season (albeit because of Joe Sakic night and the season opener).
March 14, at Chicago Blackhawks – Western Conference Finals rematch, two of the best teams in the West, and a proven ratings winner. This and one of the Detroit dates are probably the most likely to be chosen outside of the Stockholm games.

NBC:

January 9, at Anaheim Ducks – Mainly because it’s one of only two Sunday games they will play after the new year begins. It would be nice if NBC recognized the Sharks/Ducks rivalry, but fat chance of that happening.
February 13, at Florida Panthers – Mainly because it’s one of only two Sunday games they will play after the new year begins. Like with Anaheim, fat chance that they’ll show a game between a California and Florida team.

Basically, don’t hold your breath for an NBC game this season, unless the Sharks make it to the Western Conference Finals again.

Month by Month Breakdown

October
5* home, 4 road, 13,947.773 miles traveled

The second-shortest month in terms of games due to the season starting mid-October and the travel from Sweden, it also has the most miles traveled due to the travel to and from Sweden. All non-playoff teams except for New Jersey and Colorado, although a lot of those teams were somewhat competitive. The Sharks should come out with a winning record.

*One of the home games the Sharks play is actually in Sweden.

November
8 home, 6 road, 9,339.591 miles traveled

Fairly even in terms of home and road games, this is also the month that falls in the middle in terms of travel (which is kind of bad, seeing as they still travel almost 10,000 miles). This month also features a lot of non-playoff teams, and only two teams from the Eastern Conference. No travel to the east, though, which is a plus. Should also be a winning record.

December
5 home, 10 road, 12,822.08 miles traveled

They start off the month with an eastern road trip from hell – all playoff teams, including the two Eastern Conference finalists and Detroit. And then they come back to play Chicago. Joy. This month is not going to be a fun month, between playing Detroit once and Chicago twice, as well as a lot of early starts. Plus, it has the second most miles traveled. Should still get a winning record, but not overwhelmingly so as with the first two months.

January
7 home, 5 road, 5,670.62 miles traveled

Second shortest month in terms of travel, which is partially because of the All Star game at the end of the month. It marks the second return of Ron Wilson with the Toronto Maple Leafs coming to the Tank, but it unfortunately doesn’t look like the second return of Toskala as well. Unless he signs with a different team, of course. Will be the first time Brad Staubitz returns to San Jose, though!

February
3 home, 10 road, 12,270.96 miles traveled

This month will be the one where we’ll wonder if the HP Pavilion actually exists or if it’s just a mythical structure from our dreams. Third most miles traveled – and not by much – and the second Eastern Conference road trip, including a game agains the Boston Bruins which will begin at 10am (!!). This is the last month the Sharks will go to the Eastern time zone. Some very competitive teams during this month – I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the Sharks go .500 or even compile a losing record. I mean, I doubt it, but it wouldn’t surprise me.

March
10 home, 4 road, 6,372.589 miles traveled

This is the month where we go, “It’s no place like home,” and forget that you actually have to travel. There is an emphasis on the Pacific Division teams, although a few other Western Conference teams – and a lone Eastern Conference team – are sprinkled in there. The last time the Sharks will travel out of division is on the 14th, to Chicago. They should probably accrue a record above .500.

April
3 home, 2 road, 1,259.368 miles traveled

Easily the least travel the Sharks have, what with only playing 5 games and only within the division. With so few games – and at least three of them being against playoff teams – this month is hard to predict the record. Depends on whether or not the Ducks go into rebuilding mode, and whether Phoenix’s season last year was a fluke built off of many, many shootout wins (probably not, but something to consider).

Games of Note

October 8/9, against Columbus – The season opener and one in Stockholm, to boot. It’s fun to watch how other countries treat sports. As long as it’s not South Africa. Those vuvuzelas are making me crazy.

November 24, versus Chicago – The first rematch between the two Western Conference finalists, however different they may look. Should be a fun – if nerve-wracking – game.

December 2, at Ottawa – The first time Dany Heatley returns to Ottawa since the trade. I expect a lot of boos. A LOT of boos.

December 8, at Philadelphia – Always fun to go to Philly, what with them being the Prince of Wales Trophy winners and having Alternate Captain Elbows (who I have since admitted to not minding, particularly if he is playing a team that I don’t like). Also: BOOOOOOOOSH!

January 11, versus Toronto – I don’t know why, I just like games where the Sharks play the Leafs. Wait, I know why – the Sharks tend to win, and Leafs fans are hilarious.

February 5, at Boston – Only the third time Thornton has returned to Boston since The Trade (Sharks seem to have a lot of those, don’t they?), and it should be interesting. If Scott Nichol re-signs with the Sharks, I’d love to see him knock down Zdeno Chara again.

February 17, versus Washington – It’s always fun when the Capitals come to the Tank. Well, fun for the Sharks. Not so fun for the Capitals.

April 9, versus Phoenix – The final game of the season and Fan Appreciation Night at the Tank, it should be a good one.

Any game against any team Nabokov signs with – Evgeni Nabokov is awesome, and will be wearing a different sweater for the first time in his NHL career. While at the time of writing I have no idea which team Nabby will be with, I am definitely looking forward to applauding our quirky Russian/Kazakh goalie for his time with the Sharks.

In Conclusion

The Sharks will play back-to-back 14 times this year, up one from last season, and none of them will feature two home games in a row (although the two Sweden games will be in the same place, only one is considered a home game). The shortest distance between non-Sweden back-to-backs is 176.467 miles (between Edmonton and Calgary), and the longest is 802.73 miles (between Dallas and Chicago).

The All Star Game returns this year, so no two-week break. The All Star Game will be January 29-30 in Raleigh, North Carolina. The Sharks likely won’t have any starters (since Sharks fans tend to not start any massive fan campaigns), but will likely have at least two representatives, being one of the top teams in the league. I suspect Logan Couture will be tabbed for the Young Stars game, maybe even one of their goalies.

October, December, and February all suck in terms of travel, with at least 12,000 miles each month, and a total of 39,040.813 miles. Some teams don’t travel that much during the entire season.

There are four early afternoon games (two noon, two 2pm). But there are also two morning games – one at 10am in Boston, and one at 11am in Montreal. I am not looking forward to those two games.

The total miles traveled is a whopping 61,682.98 miles. That’s 14,727 miles more than last season. And last season they decreased their travel amount by around 10,000 miles than the season before, where they by far traveled the most miles. Rarely – if ever – does a team break 60K miles traveled in a season, and the Sharks are doing it. Sweden adds to that, as does their trips to Montreal and Boston, the two furthest teams from San Jose. Makes me question why the Sharks would be chosen for Europe in a year where they have to travel the furthest anyways, but whatever.

Rob Blake wasn’t quite the fan favorite that Jeremy Roenick was, but he was one of the Sharks’s best shut-down defensemen in his two years here, despite him reaching 40 and his propensity for hooking and interference penalties (hence his nickname, “Captain Hook”). He was a leader for the Sharks in every sense of the word.

Here is a live blog of his press conference.

11:02 – Brodie Brazil and Dan Rusanowski introduce the press conference. Devin Setoguchi, Evengi Nabokov, Joe Thornton, and Patrick Marleau are all here. So is Mike Ricci. Also lots of Rob’s non-Sharks friends. Maybe I’m reading too much into this, but I’m taking the presence of the three free agents (plus Joe) as a good sign for their re-signing prospects. But that’s just me over-analyzing.

11:03 – Greg Jamison just used the phrase “rain on our parade” to describe Blake’s effect on the Sharks throughout the years while he was with the Avalanche and Kings. Now I have that song stuck in my head.

11:04 – Blake would have been a farmer if not for a hockey player. “It would have been a great farm.”

11:05 – Blake has 10th-most goals, 3rd-most power play goals among defensemen of all time. It was such a great moment when he passed Doug Wilson on the all-time list. Sort of a full circle moment – the first Sharks captain’s place in history had been surpassed by the current Sharks captain.

11:05 – “It took us about 5 years to convince him to come here, and it was well worth the wait.” Doug Wilson showing that he always targets guys for a long time before he actually gets them.

11:06 – DW is crediting Blake’s wife for all of his success, since he achieved most accolades after he got married. “Probably should have married her earlier.”

11:08 – Awww, DW is talking about Blake’s father and their mutual respect for each other. Also, DW just offered Blake a job. Well, he offered Blake’s wife to take Blake off her hands by giving Blake a job.

11:09 – Dan R just gave me a bit of a scare – “Now, let me introduce the captain of the Sharks -” Wait, they’re introducing the new captain now?!? “-Rob Blake.” Ohhhh, phew.

11:10 – Rob Blake just said it, so it’s official. “I am announcing my retirement.” The guy barely got through that statement.

11:11 – Make a wish!

11:11 – Very emotional moment for a guy who doesn’t wear his emotions on his sleeves.

11:12 – Telephone time! First up: Todd McLellan.

11:12 – McLellan is disappointed that he’s retiring. Blake definitely could have gone another year as a top 4 defensemen, easy. But McLellan said that he’s definitely going to tap into Blake as a resouce.

11:14 – Bob Nicholson (CEO of Hockey Canada) called in. Blake won gold in Finland and Salt Lake City, and so Nicholson is thanking him for his dedication to his country and Team Canada.

11:16 – Joe Sakic! Taping Sakic’s message off of a TV probably wasn’t the best idea.

11:16 – “I’m proud that I can say that I had an opportunity to play with Rob Blake.” Also told Blake that he’s going to love retirement, haha.

11:18 – Rob Blake highlight package. Still not a fan of the whole “recording off the TV thing.”

11:19 – There’s Blake’s famous hip check.

11:19 – Haha, probably a good third of the highlights are him scoring against/checking the Sharks.

11:20 – At least he was able to complete his career with a Cup. I hate that Roenick was never able to.

11:21 – Rob Blake didn’t go into the year thinking he would retire, but as the season went on, he knew he was going to.

11:22 – On what he is going to do: “I don’t know, I have to confer with my wife on that.” HAHA!

11:23 – He definitely wants to stay in the game, probably in a mangement role.

11:23 – Haha, a reporter asked him about stories that his teammates would rather not share. “We’ve been taking over this lifeguard tower in front of our house for the last couple of weeks.”

11:24 – “One of the more proud moments I’ve had was named captain here in San Jose.”

11:25 – Asked who he thinks should be the next captain. Sidestepped the answer, said that there’s a leadership group in the locker room.

11:27 – There was an extreme feeling of disappointment after this season. “It’s not rewarding unless you can build on it next year.” Players also understand that they need to put more work in for the Cup.

11:27 – LA Times on the phone. Asked about if he regretted not winning the Cup with the Kings. Let me answer for him: DUH.

11:28 – Credits Larry Robinson as a big influence on his game.

11:28 – NHL.com guy on the phone. Since Blake has been in California during it’s major growth period, he was asked about hockey in the Golden State.

11:29 – Blake talks about how the amount of hockey here would be unheard of when he started playing. Credits the Junior Sharks and Junior Kings.

11:30 – Haha, Blake has already been signed up as an assistant coach for his sons’ teams. Not quite head coach, though.

11:31 – “I think that Rob Blake is one of the classiest players that have ever worn the Sharks jersey.”

11:31 – “…and when the Sharks win the Stanley Cup…” HELL YEAH!

11:32 – Press conference over. He’ll be on Chronicle Live later tonight after the Giants game.

11:33 – Final thoughts: a lot shorter than Roenick’s press conference, and less goofy than JR’s laugh-fest with Tkachuck talking about how he was either going to be on Dancing with the Stars or a judge on American Idol. But the professionalism suits Blake – I’d be a little shocked if he did joke around more than he did – and it was a nice ending to such a great career.

Thank you, Blake, for being such a great player and a great captain for the Sharks. Your influence on the game, between your booming slapshot and lethal hip checks, will be missed. I know Vlasic is already missing you.