There was a mighty curse on the Blackhawks this year. No, not the one that they got from being from the same city as the Cubs, and not the much-hyped “Hossa Curse” (Marian Hossa has been to the Cup Finals three times in three years on three different teams… and only now has a Cup to show for it). It was the Curse of the Sharks – the 16 year long streak where any team matched up with the Sharks was doomed to fall short of the Cup.

Twelve times the Sharks had made the playoffs, and twelve times they or their opponents did not lift the Stanley Cup. It started with their miracle run of 1994, where they upset the Cup-favorite Wings in 7 games only to face the Maple Leafs (no, really!) and fall in 7 games (once again, really!). They then fell to the Vancouver Canucks in 5 games in the Western Conference Finals, and thus, a curse was born.

The teams that have fallen victim, in order: Toronto Maple Leafs (94), Detroit Red Wings (95), Dallas Stars (98), Colorado Avalanche (99), Dallas Stars (00), St. Louis Blues (01), Colorado Avalanche (02), Calgary Flames(04), Edmonton Oilers (06), Detroit Red Wings (07), Dallas Stars (08), and Anaheim Ducks (09). And yes, Sharks fans do not like the Dallas Stars or the Detroit Red Wings. We do, however, take solace in the fact that once they beat us, they won’t win the Cup. Or did.

What does this mean? Well, it means that the 6 or so hours I put into researching and writing this initial explanation of the Curse, and this examination of whether any other team had something similar happen to their opponents (SPOILER! it hasn’t) was all for naught. It could also, potentially, mean that the San Jose Sharks themselves will get over that darned playoff hump and finally bring a championship back to the Bay Area. We need one. I mean, when teams like the Golden State Warriors and Oakland Raiders have had the most recent post-season success after the Sharks, you know that it’s bad.

So, congrats to Chicago for flipping off all the curses and jinxes in the world, planning parades and painting Cup murals and acquiring Hossa, and winning the Cup. I may kind of hate your team, but the Cup is quite an accomplishment. Just, why oh why did Patrick freaking Kane have to score the overtime winner? Are you trying to kill me?

So, the Sharks are out. I’ll probably have more to say later, once this really sinks in and I can fully digest it, but here is my first post-series reaction that I posted over at Fear the Fin:

This season was a great season by all accounts. We finished first in the Western Conference in the regular season, setting records of the most third period regulation comebacks. We scored 6 goals in the third period against Nashville. We beat Calgary 9-1 (!!!) in a busting of schnides.

Even in the playoffs, where we are known for not quite performing up to expectations, we did well. We were so kick-ass, we decided to score 6 game winning goals against Chicago, instead of the four that you’re supposed to. We rose above the own-goals and decided, “To hell with it,” and beat Colorado. I know I was a bit despondent after Game 3 (I had a post-it on the door warning people to not talk to me about hockey of any sort), and that they came out and righted ship immediately was awesome.

Detroit… We slayed some serious demons there. Five games. Five games! And we won a game in the Joe! Honestly, as soon as they beat Detroit, I had declared this post-season a success. For years, Detroit has been in our heads. For years, we could not beat them, in the regular season or the playoffs. And then this year, we did it. And not in seven games, like in 1994. But in five. I’m proud of the boys for that. I don’t care what anyone else says – they showed heart in that series.

As for Chicago, well, it sucked, not going to lie. The first series I could actually watch on TV was the series where they went winless (I maintain that if I stayed in LA, they would have won, but whatever). The fact is, despite the sweep, the boys played great. A few bounces that go the other way, and Chicago might have been swept. There was no giving up by the Sharks; they were always pushing back, trying to get the win. That shorty by Marleau was a thing of beauty (also, something I totally called right before the PK). Unfortunately, they couldn’t, and here we are today.

Pavelski was the hero against Colorado, Thornton stepped up against Detroit, and Marleau was pretty much the entire offense against Chicago. Nabokov was a steady presence in goal, allowing a few softies but keeping out what needed to be kept out for the most part. Our big guns were our big guns (except for Heatley, who I suspect is still injured).

We ran into two goalies standing on their heads. We got past one, but fell to another. That’s how things work. I’m not going to bitch and complain about the lack of scoring or penalties called (during the game, sure, but afterwards what’s done is done). The Chicago Blackhawks were the better team. We knew this going into the series, and we know this coming out. Not by much, but still, better. They are the consensus pick for the Cup, well, except for those who picked Washington. It was not a surprise to lose to them; when we entered this series, and when I woke up this morning, I fully expected that the Sharks would not get past this round. Not that I didn’t hope the Sharks would manage to win it, but my expectations were set low. And I’m okay with that.

This was a great season. This off-season will suck, I’m not gonna lie. All the upcoming free agents – restricted and not – kicked ass in the playoffs. Pavelski was a man possessed. Setoguchi provided a good physical force. Marleau was over a point per game. Nabokov stood tall in net. Malhotra was great in the faceoff circle and on defense. Nichol was the little ball of energy we all know and love. Blake looked like he was 30, not 40. But choices will have to be made, unless all of them will play for less than $2M each, which I highly doubt. We’ll likely be losing one of Marleau or Nabokov, and my bet is on our quirky Russian.

But that’s for the future, for the rest of May and June and all the way up through October, when we’ll be starting in Sweden. Faces will stay, and faces will leave, but one thing will stay the same:

Go Sharks.

Also, I’d like to apologize to anyone that I offended or insulted in my last post. I do hate the Blackhawks (especially Dustin Byfuglien) and I hate their bandwagon fans. But lumping all of them in together with the good fans was not fair of me. I got a little (HAH!) emotional during the series, and wanted to vent. And I did. In doing so, however, this stopped being the quasi-professional blog and became more like a Livejournal, which I don’t think anybody wants. I can’t promise it won’t happen again, but I will try to refrain from writing something so emotional and pointed and posting it without sleeping on it first. To make up for it, I present you with a few GIFs that will hopefully cheer you up. Or make you more depressed, depends.

Douchebag.

Some will think that this hatred has come about from this Western Conference Finals series. Some will think that this post has stemmed from the recent Game 3 loss. They’d be partially right – my hatred for this “storied” franchise has been exacerbated by the series, and the post itself is because of the Game 3 loss. But I’ve hated – really hated – the Blackhawks for almost as long as I’ve been a die-hard Sharks fan. Honestly, I think I might like Dallas and Anaheim more than Chicago, and I’m a Sharks fan. That’s how much I hate the team.

You see, the Blackhawks used to be the team you could shit on. Remember how people keep ragging on the Coyotes about their attendance? Well, the Blackhawks were in the same boat. They had a 50% capacity for a few years there. Five zero. And the worst part was that they, you know, actually had a history of hockey in the area. They had no freaking excuse for attendance that low, and yet, there they were.

“Oh, but what about Bill Wirtz???” Yeah yeah yeah, I know all about your crappy owner. Welcome to most expansion teams’ situations, douchebag. And they don’t have the protection from relocating that you as an Original Six team does. So say all you want about how you were protesting against Wirtz’s reign as an owner, and boo all you want during the moment of silence for him (by the way, real classy of you). You know that your threats were hollow, and the lack of attendance really meant diddly squat.

The Blackhawks tanked their way to a good team, building up high draft pick after high draft pick until, hey! Good team! They walked out onto a fucking red carpet before the 2008-09, and all I could think was, “pretentious, much?” I mean, this was a team that didn’t even make the playoffs a year before, in a league where 53% of all teams do. I’d understand the Red Wings doing so, or hell, even the Penguins. The Blackhawks did jack shit to deserve the red carpet, outside of, you know, existing.

And then they got the Winter Classic. Really? I get Wrigley Field is historic and iconic, and the home to the only reason why more people don’t focus on the Blackhawks’ hilariously long drought (NINETEEN SIXTY ONE). But come on, why not Red Wings-Avalanche, if you’re using the Red Wings? That’s a much more interesting rivalry to pretty much everyone except Blackhawks fans, apparently, but since they couldn’t be bothered to show up prior to that season, they really don’t count.

Then the Blackhawks made the playoffs. Whoop-de-freaking-doo, the Sharks have been doing that every year since 2004. And then they made it to the Western Conference Finals, and all of a sudden the media was on their collective dick. They got nationally broadcast by both NBC and Versus; not only that, but the broadcasters actually compliment the team! (An experience I know that I have yet to enjoy as a Sharks fan).

So now the Blackhawks are winning, and the bandwagonners are coming out of the woodwork. “I’ve always been a Blackhawks fan!” “Really? Don’t you think Jeremy Roenick is awesome?” “…Who’s he?” Honestly, if you don’t know who JR is, you are not a Blackhawks fan. That’s like being an Oilers fan and not knowing who Gretzky is, a Penguins fan ignorant of Lemieux, a Red Wings fan in the dark about Yzerman, an Avalanche fan not knowing Sakic. If you don’t know who Roenick is, you are not a Blackhawks fan. Fact.

I’ve met Blackhawks fans who don’t know who Toews, Kane, Keith, or Niemi are. How? How can that be? How can you call yourself a fan of a team if you don’t even know any of the players? I mean, I barely know football – I doubt I can even name all the teams – but even I still know a few of the players on the 49ers, a team I like in a “between Raiders and Niners which teams sucks less” way. How can someone call themselves a fan – a fan – of a team and not know any of the players? This infuriates me.

Because of this early success, Blackhawks fans are some of the most entitled, ignorant fans I have ever had the displeasure of coming across. They completely ignore their past, completely overlook their own team’s struggles and lack of championships and feel that it is their right to taunt other teams on the lack of success. They act like because they’ve had two good seasons, they deserve a Stanley Cup. They feel like since they are finally filling their arena again, they have a right to pick on struggling nontraditional market teams. For a long time the Red Wings have had the most annoying fans, but at least that was backed up by championships. What do the Blackhawks have? A central division banner? The red carpet? Puh-lease.

I know there are good fans out there that showed up during the lean times, that aren’t taking this success for granted, I know that. But you have been completely drowned out by your douchebag compatriots.

Also, Patrick Kane is possibly the biggest douchebag I’ve ever seen. He beat up a cab driver over twenty cents? Really?! There’s more money in my couch than that. His shirtless in the limo pictures from Vancouver out-douched the entire cast of Jersey Shore, impossible as that seems. His playoff mullet makes me want to punch him in the face. Hated him on the Blackhawks, hated him on Team USA. Dustin Byfuglien (Bufflin for all those Blackhawks “fans”) is another douche, but not quite on the same level. He’s like a homeless man’s Holmstrum.

I hate the Chicago Blackhawks. My team has no rivalry with them, no playoff history with them outside of this year, and yet they’re still probably my first or second most hated team. I don’t see any redeeming quality about them. Just a very, very hateable team that I’ll look forward to booing and trash-talking for years to come.

Go die in a fire, Chicago. Wait, too soon?

If you haven’t noticed (although, it’s kind of hard to miss), I’ve been sort of MIA the past month. Now, there are plenty of reasons for that – the up and down, ulcer-inducing roller coaster that is the playoffs, the papers I’ve had to write for my classes, studying for finals, all that jazz. But the biggest reason why I haven’t updated is why I’m posting today – a little project I call Pokecheck.

You see, I’m in AHIS001 here at USC, which is a web design course for non-majors. For our final project, we had to make a functional 15+ page site using the concepts that we’ve learned during the course of the semester. I’ve been wanting to create a guide to hockey for a while now, but the task seemed a bit daunting for something that I would do in my free time (it ended up being 43 pages). So I decided to not do the photo gallery-type site that most of my classmates are doing, and instead make something functional and worth the time that I put in.

And thus, Pokecheck was born. It’s a guide to hockey with a major emphasis on the NHL, but not overlooking the other leagues in North America and around the world. I’m not going to pretend it’s a be-all, end-all guide to hockey – it’s not. I can already think of a dozen things that I want to add to it, like the playoff beard suggestion @dlow_twit suggested to me over twitter, or a larger explanation of college hockey. And that will come soon (after finals, of course).

You can get to it either by clicking on the banner, or going to the link that I’ve put up on the top of every page here at Fools and Sages. Comments or suggestions are welcome – especially for the NHL teams section. I found out just how much I didn’t know about other teams by trying to write about all of them, haha.

So, check it out, enjoy, and hopefully you learn something.

I felt that this was monumental enough to break my hiatus.

First time since 2004 that the Sharks made the Western Conference Finals. Second time in franchise history.

Best of all? It was over Detroit. In FIVE games.

Big post dropping tomorrow morning.

Let’s do this.

It’s over. After 82 games and 6 and a half months, it’s over. There are no more games to fine-tune things, no more worrying about jockeying for positions in the standings. For fourteen teams, meaninful hockey is over until October. But for sixteen teams, it is the most exciting, nerve-wracking, ulcer-inducing, amazing time of the year. Playoffs.

The Sharks clinched first overall in the Western Conference for the second year in a row on the back of a three-game winning streak and an overtime win by the Evil Empire (aka, Detroit). And yes folks, this means another Western Conference Regular Season Champions banner. But honestly? That’s awesome. They deserve it for the year they’ve had.

Statistically in almost every way the Sharks did not play as well as they did last year. The had fewer wins, fewer goals, and worse defense. Yet I contend that this season’s team is stronger than its past incarnation. The Sharks of 08-09 relied on a ridiculous 2008 to get them their President’s Trophy, finishing up as a rather mediocre team. The Sharks of 09-10 were pressured every step of the way, transforming themselves from a team that relied solely on skill to one that used quite a bit of will as well.

I can sing platitudes about each player, but I’ll save that for a later post. Now is for the final two games that decided our fate, the final two home games of the season.

The game against Vancouver was a game against a team that had almost nothing to play for; they had locked up the third seed a while ago and weren’t moving no matter what they did. They rested a few guys, and came out sloppy. By the end of the second, the Sharks were up 4-0 in what was shaping up to be another in what has been a long line of Shark dominations of the Canucks in the Tank. But then came the third period.

The third period featured 76 penalty minutes. That means for every minute played in the third, there were almost 4 minutes in penalties handed out. Frankly, things got ugly. Fight after fight, scrum after scrum, and a period where the Sharks took minor after minor. At one point, there were six Sharks in the penalty box, creating a standing room only situation. The refs started giving out game misconducts to players just because there wasn’t enough room. The Sharks ended up having to kill around 5 minutes straight, including a full 2 minute 5-on-3. It would have been perfect if not for a last-minute 4-on-3 goal by the Canucks. The Canucks would score again to make it 4-2, but that was as close as they got and the Sharks closed it out.

As I watched that game, all I could think was how they were ready for the playoffs. They didn’t crumple, or shy away, something that they are known to do once the going gets rough. Instead, they fought back. Everybody. Not just the guys who are known to drop the gloves, but the skill players and the normally timid players. No one was shying away from the challenge. That is why they are ready.

Then, on Saturday, the Sharks did something they haven’t done since 2004 – win their final regular season game. Kind of pathetic when you think about it, considering the record the Sharks have accrued over the years. And yet, they prevailed 3-2 over the Coyotes in a shootout.

The game wasn’t as much of a statement game as the one against the Canucks was; it was back-and-forth, but neither team got much flow. What was probably most impressive was that the Sharks won in the shootout against Phoenix, a team that got 14 of its wins from the shootout. That should count for double or something.

But that’s all over. Now, we have to focus on the Sharks’ first round opponent: the Colorado Avalanche. A surprise team to finish higher than last in the conference, much less get a playoff spot. But they deserve to be there, on the back of stellar play from backup-turned-starter Craig Anderson and some great performances from rookies like Matt Duchene. They’ve been slumping going into the playoffs, but that doesn’t matter. The Sharks need to come out, and come out hard to challenge the playoff-inexperienced team.

First round starts on Wednesday, at 7:30pm in the Tank. Go Sharks.