So, two viewings, six hours, four pages of notes, and ten pages typed later, I finally have my Apocalypse review. Enjoy! ;D

First of all, I must say that I had INSANELY high expectations for this episode. I didn’t try, but after all the preliminary spoilers came out, and all the stills and the director’s cut (props to Mr. Welling for that), I just couldn’t help but expect more from this episode than pretty much any other episode this season. Not that that was hard or anything, but still. Best thing is? It totally delivered.

So the episode starts out with the stereotypical Smallville scene – Clark is in his loft, and Lana’s there. Luckily, only a pictorial representation, but still. Its like the loft and Lana go together like PB&J – no, wait, that’s a reference to Jim and Pam on The Office (Jam, haha). Erm… Liver and onions! Two things that go together that I absolutely hate.

Somehow, Clark receives a new message from Kara in Dr. Swann’s journal. Now, that’s a pretty cool idea, but it was my understanding that there was no separate dimension for the past. That, if something was altered in the past, the present would be affected by those changes and nobody would know the difference. Like, in Back to the Future. When Marty changed 1955 and went back to 1985, nobody knew that the present was different. So how should Clark know that there was a new message from Kara? Unless Smallville made up their own system of time travel including alternate dimensions and people being aware of the changes to the time stream.

You know, at this point in the series, it really shouldn’t surprise me that the Fortress has a portal that not only can go into the past, but also all the way to Krypton. It shouldn’t, but it does. At least they’re being somewhat consistent with the fact that the Fortress and AI!Jor-El are pretty much all-powerful.

I don’t think Clark realized (at this point in the episode) that even if he didn’t come to Earth, Krypton still exploded, and there still would be a meteor shower. Which means there still would be meteor freaks.

The way that he went all “Its a Wonderful Life” on Chloe makes me think that he’s a bit depressed and maybe even a bit suicidal – not the Clark Kent that we’re familiar with. As much as they glossed over his depression, I believe that what we saw tonight was Clark at his lowest, a Clark that had nothing to live for and wanted to die. Even when he ran away to Metropolis at the end of S2, he didn’t want to die. He just wanted to get away. But this Clark – geez.

So Clark meets alt!Clark. And while we know that the Kents would have had a child around S3, the child would be only four years old if it was a directly parallel timeline – even if it was in the future, I doubt it would be at least a decade into the future, which is what it would be if alt!Clark actually went to SV High. Which pretty much means if Martha and Jonathan kept trying while Clark was young, they would conceive.

Either that, or alt!Clark is adopted. I’m leaning on the former theory, though.

Huge commercial for Speed Racer. Is anyone else thoroughly not excited to see it? Way too much CGI, in my opinion. And its made by the guys who made the Matrix, and we all know how much that trilogy sucked. Which is a lot.

Back the episode – Clark is pretty much revealing everything to alt!Clark due to his tendency to think out loud (at least he’s thinking!). And, understandably at this point, alt!Clark is getting pretty freaked out. But he wasn’t about to mess with a pretty solid guy that happened to be a few inches taller than he was as well.

The look on Clark’s face when he heard that Jonathan was alive was just pure happiness. Sure, Clark pretty much forgot about Jonathan after a few episodes, with only a few mentions here and there, but that moment really hit home about how much Clark misses him. We need more moments like that, where the loss of so many people close to Clark actually affects him.

I wonder how long it took wardrobe to find an old SVH letter jacket. Which reminds me – how awesome is it that they actually referenced the distant past in this episode, namely, high school? The fact that Chloe and Lana would never be friends if it wasn’t for Clark, and that Lana would have remained a cheerleader. Its those little things from episodes long passed (LOOOOONNNGGG passed) that really makes viewers become loyal. It tells us that yes, they have been paying attention, and yes, they do care about the show.

Speaking of past mentions, a Gabe Sullivan mention! Two, actually, if you count Lois’s later comment about hair pieces. Just when you thought to completely count him out, believing that he went the way of Lucas Luthor, he comes back in those two mentions. Not as much as Nell’s celebrated return (showing where, exactly, Lana’s charming moral beliefs came from), but still. More than the past few seasons.

You know, I almost sensed a bit of relief when Chloe turned down Clark’s request of helping him – although, that might have been more on my end than anything else. Without Clark, it really shows that Chloe wouldn’t be sidetracked with all of his sudden requests and Google searches. She’d be living a normal, happy life with a fiancé while still being a computer nerd (“inner database” line) and was a reporter for at least the Torch.

I was just writing down “Jimmy with bowtie!” when in comes Lois, and so on my notes it looks like “Jimmy w/ bowLOIS!” Odd, yes, but that just shows the desperation I was feeling after last week’s train wreck.

That POV shot as Jimmy’s camera was brilliant – great harkening back to STM, especially the fact that he follows Lois throughout her journey through the Planet. Ahh, Jimmy and his little crush on Lois. Such a great dimension added to the episode, even though it probably takes up the expanse of ten seconds or so. That’s what makes an episode great – when they not only focus on the big picture, but all the minute details as well.

So, Clark is schmoozing up to Jimmy. And I know the two haven’t had much interaction outside of the occasional “Jimmy is jealous” scene, but this makes me feel like they seriously could be close friends in the future. I was actually left wanting more Clark/Jimmy interaction. Maybe its because I’m desperate for Clark to have any guy friend, but it still stands – that Clark/Jimmy scene was pretty cool. Even though Jimmy was completely possessive over Lois.

When Jimmy asked Clark if he worked at the Daily Planet, I couldn’t help but hear a small little twinge of disappointment in Clark’s “No.” It almost seemed like, at that moment, Clark wished he could say “Yes” and be a part of the newspaper.

Hmmm…. Pierre Russo and Lana Lang. Er, Lana Russo. All you really need to do is take out the i, replace the double rs with a t, switch the o and u, and then take out the u. Its the French Pete Ross! Only not black. Or blonde. And with a really weird scarf. Sorta reminds me of this Colbert Report segment. (starts at about 1:25)

“Clumsy, but cute.” YES!! Oh, how I love that line. And how Clark caught Lois. I’m seriously having a squee attack over here. That look from Lois pretty much seals the deal. I predict that we will have many a great Clark/Lois scene (please, ignore the fact that I saw the Director’s Cut).

“So, Kent, do you always bowl women over the first time you meet them?” Another awesome line that I sort of glanced over the first time I watched because of the previous line. If Lois’s attraction wasn’t obvious enough with the first line, the second one just reinforces it.

You know what? All of Lois’s lines are pretty much awesome. Heroes exiting stage left? “That’s what it says on my Pulitzer?” This is why all the good episodes have Lois in them. She gets the best lines, the best development, the best arcs, the best pretty much everything. Except for he-who-shall-not-be-named, but I like to believe that is one misstep in a long line of awesomeness.

I noticed that in one of those transition shots of Metropolis – a new one – that the entire scenery is grey, except for the Daily Planet globe glowing yellow right in the middle of the screen. Seriously, there is no color except for the Planet. Perhaps that symbolizes how the Planet is the lone beacon of light in an otherwise grey and depressing world.

The Department of Domestic Security is yet against rearing its ugly head. Its like, TPTB thought of this great parallel to the Department of Homeland Security and decided to milk it for all its worth. But Kara – ahem, Linda Davners – is the head of it, which I find strangely ironic.

Oh, and I can’t help but think “DDT” whenever they say “DDS” (thanks to my obsessive studying for my Environmental Sciences AP exam in less than two weeks). DDT, for those of you who don’t know, is a pesticide banned in the US and other places in the world because of it playing a large role in reducing the bald eagle population almost down to extinction, as well as being somewhat of a carcinogen. Hence, the DDS is a carcinogen, lol

What, no reading of the Miranda Rights? Well then, that arrest is null and void. Even the government has to obey the law, no matter how much the President tries to pass an act that, say, suspends the right to search without a warrant and maybe allows the free tapping into phone lines. Just saying.

Wow. In my last review, for Sleeper, I compared Lex to Hitler, since he experimented on meteor freaks and killed people. Well, Lex has reached complete Hitler status, taking control of the government through the fear of the people of those who are different (Jews vs meteor freaks), and then attempted to exterminate them. Oh, and as it is later revealed, he wants to create a master race after wiping everyone else out. Nice.

Now its Clark’s turn to be all awesome. He not only manhandles Jimmy to try and get Lois’s location, but he also goes into reporter mode, trying to find out what happened to Lois and what is up with Lex’s presidency. I’ve decided we need Clark in reporter mode more often; it is a lot more fun to watch and infinitely more interesting than Chloe looking everything up on the internet.

And Jimmy – wow, haven’t really seen him that selfish before. He seems almost like he really dislikes Clark, especially since Clark is the one all concerned about Lois and crusading to try and rescue her, while Jimmy is relegated to destroy information Lois wants passed on. Jimmy just seems a lot more pessimistic and mean-spirited in this AU than normal. Its kinda strange to watch.

Clark convincing Sheriff Adams to give him the information about Lois was definitely a treat – although, since it was in this episode, it was just one facet to the proactive image Apocalypse has of Clark. Seriously, in any other episode it would be a HUGE deal. Here, its overshadowed by the even more awesome scenes, of which there are plenty.

“Tell me where I can find Lois Lane!” Guantanamo Bay. Along with Harold and Kumar. And no, I have no intention of seeing that movie. Just was the first thing I thought of when I heard that demand from Clark, lol

The Director’s Cut scene. I probably watched the DC at least ten times, maybe more, since its just that amazing. Once again, kudos to Tom Welling for choosing such an amazing scene to show. But, since I did watch that scene so many times, there were quite a few things that I noticed (like the train was a bit later in the episode than in the DC, and Clark seemed a bit happier about rescuing Lois – again, might just be me projecting).

I don’t know why Lois’s immediate assumption that Clark is a meteor freak stood out to me so much – maybe its because we really have no idea how much the public really knows about meteor freaks since we only see that core group of people that happen to be extremely involved with the whole meteor freak thing. But it really showed how Lois doesn’t judge – hell, she was much more enamored than anything. Classic Lois Lane ;D

“Eagle to the mountain top.” Geez Clark, how could have you survived 21 years (check his driver’s license *grins*) without ever picking up the fact that “Eagle” is always the Secret Service code for the President. And then its no stretch that “mountain top” is code for a special place the president goes to. Here, it happens to be a nuclear bomb resistant shelter.

Clark seems to have no qualms about not only revealing his powers, but his extraterrestrial origins. Although the fact that Lois thinks that he’s an android pretty much makes me laugh. I mean, its not much of a stretch after Clark revealed that CoS Milton Fine was a machine to Lois, but still. Its pretty funny.

Oh, and seriously, Larry King apparently exists in the SV-verse. That also made me laugh a bit, although I’m not sure why. Perhaps its the image of Janet Jackson trying to teach him how to dance or something.

I love the Lois dressing Clark scene. Sure, it wasn’t as long as I liked, and it didn’t include any bare skin *sighs* but it was quite cute nonetheless. Lois’s comment about Clark sticking out like “a red and blue thumb” just foreshadows how Clark will choose those colors because he wants to really stand out when he eventually adapts his Superman persona.

Lois peeking deserves a paragraph to itself. I mean, really, what sane girl wouldn’t want to peek, but only Lois Lane has the balls enough to actually do it. Or, attempt to before Clark opens the door. Its like, Lois attempted to do what pretty much every girl was thinking about during that scene. You know, it must have been awkward for Tom to direct Lois fawning all over him. Fun, but awkward.

And then Clark in a suit would not be complete without a Daily Planet press pass and – *squees!* – glasses! The frames were pretty bulky, but somehow they suit the character of Clark Kent quite well. Oh, and they look exactly like the glasses that my Film Studies teacher has. Just saying.

So Lex is seriously evil in this episode. We already know that Brainiac probably plays some role in his descent, but I doubt that Lex would be that evil with only the influence from Brainiac. As Jimmy stated, he plays on the fears of the people to get himself elected. And the people includes Kara somewhat; he plays on her outsider feelings, calling her an “alien” to her face, and psychologically beating her into submission.

Even the way he just generally treats Kara makes him seem like the superior – when he is berating her for losing Lois, he commands Kara to “Look at me!” in the middle of his rant. That just reminds me of a parent punishing their child, in that the parent is obviously superior and in control of the child.

Lex even plays on people’s psyche by his use of colors – he is dressed completely in white, except for one black glove. The white, as one of my friends so eloquently stated it to my teacher, “stands for virginity” and innocence – the good. The black, on his right hand, displays how his actions will actually be bad. The stark contrast between black and white – completely forgoing any greys or neutral colors – shows that Lex views things in ultimatums and extremes. Hence, his opinion that he needs to nuke the world.

I have a slight problem with Lex’s assurance that he has “America’s best and brightest” stored away in bunkers (something that reminded me quite a bit of the LnC episode “All Shook Up”). Just having the best and brightest won’t do any good; you need the menial laborers as well to do the actual work while everyone else comes up with ways to do it. And I doubt that Lex had any farmers in his bunkers, so they’ll pretty much all starve. Great plan.

The confrontation between Clark and Kara was great – the gradual evolution of Kara’s disbelief, to acceptance, to attempted murder, to trust. In retrospect, this scene seems a bit short, but it captures what is needed to be done without detracting from any of the other scenes in the episode. Great job.

Oh, and this is probably only because I had my surround sound WAY up, but when Clark says “Milton Fine is Brainiac,” the bass comes on and man, it felt like an earthquake. Oh, and just checked – apparently, it was a minor earthquake, lol. Although it was helped a bit by the bass.

Those Kryptonite bullets – fully expected, especially after the trailer – just showed how Lex felt that he always had to stay in power. Even though he had Kara wrapped around his little finger, he always had the fear the someday she would overtake him and he would be defenseless.

And while guns are used quite a bit in Smallville, just the way that Lex shoots Clark and Kara in cold blood (twice, in Clark’s case) makes it so much more poignant. And how Clark, despite being shot twice by Lex, still tries to warn Lex from Brainiac. He still believes that he can somehow appeal to the good that is in Lex, even while writhing on the ground in pain. And that is Clark Kent.

Brainiac is just an awesome villain – I love how cold he was when he entered Lex’s office, and completely ignored Kara and Clark until he handcuffed Kara, and pretty much ignored Clark the entire conversation with Lex. The coldness just makes me shiver.

The missile launching sequence is so beautiful – its a picturesque scene of these farms, only with missiles launching behind them. All those missiles in silos out in the Midwest (hey, remember Hidden, another episode where Clark gets shot as missiles are launching?) just reminds me of the Cold War, another topic I happen to be cramming for AP tests. And the fact that, if once country launches a nuclear strike, the other country will immediately do so as well before ever getting struck, and so both countries will be destroyed into oblivion. Mutual destruction, I believe the term is. And I assume that Lex is actually trying to get this to happen, because of his ferreting away the “best and brightest” in bunkers.

Ew, is really all I have to say about the Lex/Kara thing Brainiac was talking about. Although I bet Clark was getting one hell of a case of Deja Vu. This part – where Brainiac was going to use Lex as the vessel for Zod – is what truly convinces Clark that he is vital to the world. Because while everyone else are living rather peachy lives, Zod is about to take over the world. And Zod taking over is not a good thing, no matter in what universe. Neither is nuclear war, really.

That short clip of the nukes exploding all over the Earth was really powerful – it shows that Clark has failed in trying to save that world because he was not powerful enough to stop Lex and Brainiac. Will that spur Clark on to complete more of his training (of which he had flunked out before, since he lost Kara and all)? Hopefully, but probably not.

Ooh – that last scene between Brainiac and Clark had some excellent camera work. Throughout the scene, they had a low-angle shot for Brainiac, showing his power, and a high-angle shot for Clark, showing his submissiveness. But the most effective shot that I saw was a crane shot, with the camera pointed down right over Brainiac. Brainiac dominated the shot, filling up half the screen, while Clark looked so small and weak in comparison. That shot just really stood out, because it spoke of the situation without needing any guns or blood. Excellent work, Tom.

Before we go onto the whole Jor-El exposition scene, I have to comment on one more thing. In the AU, Clark could have just hung back and let everyone do their own things, content with the fact that they were leading good lives. But no, as soon as he heard the world might be in trouble, he jumps into action and tries to save the day. It is in his nature to save the world, which is just reinforced by Jor-El’s speech. Although, I thought that the main reason that Jor-El sent Clark to Earth was to save Clark, not the Earth.

Clark comes back for a few seconds, just so we know that he doesn’t leave Chloe hanging while he goes off to Krypton. After all, he was gone for a whole millisecond *rolls eyes*

So Clark is on Krypton, and of course his brain goes directly to Lana. Apparently, those three mentions beforehand weren’t enough for the writers. Luckily, that’s all we really have with Lana, and the rest of the episode is kick-ass, so I’ll excuse it. For now.

The whole battle with Brainiac was rather anti-climatic. Although, seriously, how adorable was baby Kal-El? Especially when he covered his eyes with the blanket while Clark was getting beaten up. That was aww-worthy all unto itself.

And geez, Kara’s pretty mad. First she stabs Brainiac, and then smashes him with that rock. Not that it will do anything; chances are, Brainiac is nowhere close to being dead. Especially since he had that positively evil smile on his face. Seriously, with that metal stuff dripping out of his mouth, it was EVIL!

Back in the real world, or just the normal dimension that we’re used to, it turns out that Lana is getting worse. Now, was it just me, or did you suddenly get a happy feeling running through your body? Yeah, its pretty mean-spirited, but its really all we’ve got. Well, continuously got (since I doubt the awesomeness of this episode will translate next week). That Lana is in constant pain.

Kara believes that time travel is the way to fix all of her woes. Clark, however, knows differently – “But how do we know we won’t make it worse?” Finally, he gets the lesson that Jonathan’s death was supposed to teach him. A little late, but at least he got it. And then of course, “We can’t change the past, Kara, we can only affect the future.” Deep. Clark needs more dialogue like that.

And a Clark/Lex scene where they have some modicum of civility (remember, the last one ended up with Clark being shot twice lol). Obviously, Lex still is in love with Lana, or at least deeply cares for her.

When he said that what she had was “almost alien,” I laughed so hard. Yeah, almost.

But really, that scene was powerful, but simple. There was no impressive stunts or extremely wordy dialogue – just the two men facing toe to toe, trying to display their dominance without either backing down.

The final Clark scene was seriously one of the best scenes in the episode. Clark is at the Planet, not with Chloe, but by himself, researching about comas and actually being proactive about the tough situations that he’s in. I really hope that’s a permanent change.

Have I told you how much I love Lois? Calling Clark a “mild-mannered reporter for a major metropolitan newspaper” just made me even more happy inside. Although I have to dock a few points for her watching Dr. Phil.

Yet another reference to a past episode (Siren) – and while it wasn’t that far in the past, it still showed that the writers recognized that it was a big step in Clark and Lois’s relationship, instead of just discarding it as a one-time thing. Lois trying to console Clark is so sweet.

And, of course, that sweetness leads to a whole bunch of sexual tension (yay!) which Lois has to break up with one of her signature punches. The hardest one yet, in fact, which just shows how affected Lois was by the aforementioned tension.

The episode comes full circle with Lois inviting Clark out for drinks, and establishing that Clark is 21 at this point in time. And I loved how Lois put her arm around Clark, first showing how large his shoulders are (they’re HUGE!) and how close they are. To my recall, Lois has only done that with Chloe, her cousin and best friend. But now Clark has also reached that level of friendliness with Lois.

While the episode could end there, leaving viewers with an extremely happy feeling (at least, all the viewer who like Clark and Lois), there has to be one more scene tacked on to the end to try and convince people to watch next week’s Lois-less episode. Kara is in the Kent house, getting some milk, when all of the sudden she gets a really bad migraine. Probably from Brainiac, I’m thinking. And she drops the milk as she’s cringing in pain. And all I can think is “There’s no use crying over spilt milk.”

On that completely random note, the episode ends. The exec producers’s names come up for the third to last time. Oh, how I cackled evilly at that. And yes, I actually cackled. I do that sometimes

The trailer for Quest, well, doesn’t really make me want to watch it anytime soon. It’ll probably be relegated to next-day viewing, like most other episodes this season.

Overall, this episode is the top episode of the season, hands-down. Siren, really, is the only one that comes remotely close. I’m actually going to rank Apocalypse up there with Rosetta and Justice as one of the best episodes of the series.

Tom did a fantastic job at directing – there were artsy shots so it satisfied the inner film critic in me (as well as giving deeper meaning to scenes), and the character interaction was just spot-on. In fact, that’s one of the strengths of this episode – each character had the right amount of screen time for the confines of this episode in relation to their importance. There were no excessive scenes just to show one character more at the cost of the others, but rather it let the story take its natural course. I mean, there were no scenes that I thought were unnecessary.

Tom seriously needs to direct more episodes. And Turi Meyer and Al Septien need to write more.

And, since this has practically become a novel in unto itself,

The End